Sunday, July 25, 2010

Lately.....

I haven't written a blog in a really long time. Why ? I'm not sure or where this one will go I'm not sure about either. Lately I've been thinking of how mentally things have changed for me. Every day I realize more and more that I'm becoming a woman, a grown up. Is it scary? yes! The more I think about it the more mind boggling it becomes. I'm going to be 25 by the end of the year and I have yet to establish a career and quit my bullshit jobs that get my bills paid and actually find something that I truly love and enjoy. It's also time to let go of the past loves and move forward with the new and fresh start. I want to find true love instead of being in love with a lie as I was in the past. I was in a situation of make believe of something that wasn't real. I'm now ready to fall in love again and actually pursue a serious relationship that has potential for longevity, involves respect and most of all meet someone that will love me for who I am.

I can definitely admit that I'm in a neutral state of my life where there's a lot of confusion and a lot that I would love to change now or as soon as possible, however and unfortunately I can't move the hand of time on my own I have to live thru it and experience certain ups and downs to get to the right place. I have so many questions floating thru my mind that I need answers for, sometimes it becomes very difficult for me to even breathe thru the day knowing that I can't find the answers to those questions instantly. But then I think to myself and realize that everything happens in time and eventually things fall into the right place or do they?

I suppose for now I can appreciate the aspects of my life that I have now until eventually the more suitable ones for me at least, come along. Meanwhile I will remain positive and strive to grow a better person every day.


Thank you and Goodnight

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